


The Intervention

by LadyMizra



Series: Animal Husbandry [3]
Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Avengers Tower, Clint needs to stop showing Thor reality TV, Domestic Avengers, Gen, Goat Intervention, Goats, Intervention, Magic, Thor needs to put on more clothes
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-02-21
Updated: 2016-02-21
Packaged: 2018-05-22 09:06:01
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,779
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6073378
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LadyMizra/pseuds/LadyMizra
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Loki has a pet goat who is somehow getting around the Tower into places it shouldn't. Cue the Avengers having a goat intervention!</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Intervention

**Author's Note:**

> I <3 comments btw (hint hint :P) The next fic should have more Bonnabel, but for now, enjoy Loki pov!

“Loki, we need to talk.”

Loki woke at an early hour for a reason, that reason being that he wanted to avoid the other inhabitants of the tower. Yet, here he was on the common floor at seven am, and all six of the Avengers were waiting for him in the kitchen. His jaw locked and he was half-tempted to leave. However, one could only avoid people for so long and considering he had just arrived, he did not have the advantage. It was irritating knowing that they must have specifically got up early to catch him before he could get to his laboratory. It's not that he was always working, it was just a good place to hide while pretending to do something productive. There were days he did nothing but watch television or read, but since he could cloak his activities from the tower's surveillance equipment, no one was the wiser.

It was Thor who had spoke, and most of the others were alert and staring at him, which was quite uncomfortable. Tony, though, looked as if his head was going to drop at any given moment, and Clint's attention was shared with his breakfast.

“It's not polite to ambush one so early in the morning,” Loki said, entering the kitchen. He retrieved what was necessary for his breakfast from the cupboards and the fridge, and maintained a calm facade of indifference.

“You've been avoiding us for a week,” said Natasha, looking rather unlike herself. Her hair was messy, and she wore a disappointingly modest set of flannel pajamas. Unfortunately, the only one whose sleepwear revealed anything was Thor, and Loki considered the boxers he was wearing an improvement from the many times he had been subjected to his brother's nudity.

“I've been busy,” Loki lied, topping off his bowl of Fruity Pebbles with a little milk. He started to eat where he stood instead of joining the others on a stool.

“Loki you haven't shown us any progress on deciphering the text on the Magister's artifacts-”

Bruce was using a patronizing, calm tone, one he used on many occasions when he was trying not to upset someone. It made Loki's anger flare sharply. “I'm the only one who -can- decipher it. Oh, but by all means, if I'm not working fast enough..”

“That's not what this is about. It's about the fucking goat.” Ah, so Tony -was- awake. Though the fact that he was interrupting breakfast to complain about his pet was infuriating. “You know, I've actually given up on getting that damn thing out of here, but...”

“It's alright Tony, I've prepared something to say.” Thor patted Tony on the back and picked up a piece of paper that sat in front of him. The crumbly remnants of what were probably pop-tarts slid off the page.“Loki, when you avoid us, and refuse to speak to us about important matters, it hurts the team and makes us feel as if the Avengers don't matter to you. We need to-”

Almost everyone but Thor either choked on their food or started giggling. Loki was glad he was not the only one puzzled by Thor's sudden declaration of emotion. Clint was the loudest, and everyone's face collectively turned to him. “What?!”

“Clint how much reality TV have you been letting him watch?” Natasha asked.

“I appreciate the effort but this really isn't an issue that needs an intervention Thor...” Bruce softly suggested.

Steve groaned and said, “At least I know I'm not the only one you do this too.”

Loki had no idea what they were talking about, but he assumed it was a cultural misunderstanding. The way Thor forlornly folded up his piece of paper made Loki bite his tongue to keep from laughing as well. He was supposed to be outraged.

“Look, we're getting sidetracked,” Natasha said, bluntly quieting the men. “Now, I really don't care that you have a goat, but we told you a week ago that it wasn't showing up on any surveillance footage. You said you would look into it.”

“I have been,” Loki argued. It was true. He knew what the problem was, and was working on it. Did they really need him to spell out his plans in minute detail? They acted as if he was expected to give hourly reports on his progress and constantly reassure them. He worked in solitude, and he wasn't going to work any faster with them breathing down his neck.

“Yes, well, you were also told to keep the goat in your quarters,” she continued.

“I -have- been.”

The Avengers groaned in unison, and Tony finally sat up from the slouch that made him look a minute away from unconsciousness. “That -thing- is almost never in your quarters. It's always in here by the television.”

“Or in the lab,” Bruce said.

“Or the gym,” Clint pointed out.

“I even found it in my bed once,” Steve said sheepishly.

There was a moment of silence in which they all bored holes into Loki with their eyes. After a sigh, and a bite of cereal, he answered. “Well I didn't put her there. I leave her in my quarters every morning.”

“Then if you're telling the truth, not only do we have an invisible goat, we have an invisible wandering goat.” Tony pointed his spoon at Loki threateningly.

Steve finally decided to take on his role as leader and asked, “Can you tell us what you know? We're all in the dark here, and if you have some kind of explanation for this you need to share it.”

Loki combed his fingers through his hair, and silently longed for his bed or the solitary space of his lab. Why couldn't they just wait for a solution instead of drilling him with questions? He had a goat; this could not count as a matter of any urgency or importance. If she ate anything, Tony could replace it. Wasn't he the richest man on the planet? “I already know why she isn't showing up on your surveillance equipment. Like I said before, I'm looking into it.”

“Well, are you gonna share it with the class?” Clint asked, snorting in a repugnant and sarcastic manner.

After taking a breath, Loki condensed what he knew into simplistic language so the humans (and one slow-witted Asgardian) could understand. “The farm on which Thordis resided is directly above an unknown source of raw, or wild magic. That magic has seeped into everything there, plant, animal, or mineral. Magic that has not been harnessed, contained, or does not exist with a great degree of predictability interferes with various forms of technology. With the concentration of magical energy in that field, electronic devices would not function unless you knew what you were doing. If we had landed a helicopter in that field, we likely wouldn't have been able to get it working again. The goat, although no longer residing on the farm, has likely lived there her whole life. Therefore, a portion of the magic has become permanently absorbed into her being. That's why your cameras can't see her.”

Another silence came and then went. “So not only did you bring a goat to my tower... you brought a magic one?” If Tony could look anymore upset without expending energy he didn't yet have, he would look livid.

“Brother, that is highly irresponsible.”

“You really should have told us that before bringing her here,” Bruce said.

“And you guys thought I was stupid for worrying about were-goats.”

Natasha hit Clint in the shoulder for his comment, then asked a moronic question. “Is the goat a threat?”

Loki took on a patronizing tone and rolled his eyes towards the ceiling.“She's a goat. She's no more a threat than any other. Besides, I should be able to make her visible to your AI soon. Just because something has magic in them, does not mean they themselves can use it.” This was true, but not entirely. The goat was a unique case, as was this magic. He had seen unstable magic affect life before, and it wasn't pretty. Plant and animal life became corrupt and warped by its influence, becoming more dangerous as time progressed. Now, it was not as if they were using the magic. It was as if the magic was using them. But this particular Midgardian magic, though raw, was much more stable. The goat seemed relatively unaffected by it, and Loki had the sneaking suspicion she was a bit more intelligent than most. That's why he wanted to bring her back to the Tower in the first place. Yes, he did have a touch of sentiment for the animal who aided him that day, but he was mostly curious. It had been a long time since he had been able to study magic he was unfamiliar with, and he was going to relish every second of it.

The Avengers appeared to accept his word, though a few still clung to suspicion. Loki could see it in Tony, Clint, and Natasha's face. Then again, they wouldn't trust him entirely no matter what he said.

Steve raised his hand as he asked, “You named it Thordis?”

Loki smirked, and Thor covered his face. “Yes, I named her after my brother.”

“I thought you still hated your brother,” Clint said, speech garbled through a bite of cereal.

“I do.” Sometimes it was too easy to push his brother's buttons.

“I really hate to point this out, but this still doesn't explain how the goat, I mean... Thordis, has been getting around the Tower,” Bruce said, the wrinkles around his eyes creasing.

The others nodded, remembering that complaint.

“Well I don't know what to tell you,” Loki said, slowly stirring the contents of his cereal bowl. “If she was using magic, I would know about it.”

It was at that point that the elevator door dinged, alerting the group that someone was coming up. Loki assumed it was Pepper, and he and the others turned in anticipation. However when the doors opened, his stomach dropped. It was the goat. She trotted out towards the television as if nothing was amiss, barely giving them a cursory glance. This was intriguing, Loki thought. She must be more intelligent than even he assumed if she had managed to figure out how to use the elevator.

While most of the others stared, equal parts flabbergasted and impressed, Tony dropped his forehead to the counter in front of him. His mumbled words were more resigned than irritated. “Just fix this.”

Loki knew he would. However, a part of him enjoyed Tony's misery far too much to not take his time.


End file.
